The Lost Art of Letter Writing

Does anybody handwrite letters anymore?  I was just doing some spring cleaning and found some letters my grandma has written me over the years.

My grandma wrote me quite a few letters, and I'm sure she did it for all her grandchildren because that's just the kind of lady she was.  However, in my adolescence, I didn't see the value in keeping them, and unfortunately probably trashed quite a few of them.  Luckily, some of them struck my fancy, and I kept them.  I made a point of starting to keep them in college, and I am so thankful that I did.

My sweet sweet grandma has Alzheimer's and is in a nursing home, so I haven't received a letter from her in many many years.  Unfortunately, neither have I been able to have a substantive conversation with her in a very long time either.  But this weekend, I read through all of those letters and could envision her sitting down at her desk or her kitchen table and putting pen to paper writing down her sweet and encouraging thoughts that always made me feel so loved.  On the one hand, it made me sad because I don't get to talk to her anymore, and I feel like I never really got to say goodbye to her as she has slowly slipped away.  But more so it made me thankful.  Thankful that God blessed me with such a lovely grandmother who cared enough to sit down and write me notes.  Thankful that I get the joy of opening them up every few years to be reminded of her love for me.

My pappaw carried on the tradition after grandma couldn't remember anymore.  His notes were limited to birthday cards, but I love them none-the-less.  Usually he was just updating me on the progress of his garden and grandma's health or who came over for dinner the night before, but I love that he cared enough to write more than just "Happy Birthday."  

In the days of email, we can stay more easily connected which is great.  But let's be honest, how many of us are going to browse through our inbox reading old emails?  It's so much more impersonal.  So my challenge to you is this.  Sit down and write someone an old-fashioned handwritten letter.  It may take a bit more time and would require you to purchase some actual stamps, but I promise you the person receiving the letter will be so happy to be on the receiving end of it.  And I'm betting they just might stick it in a drawer and find it in a few years and experience the same joy re-reading it and thinking back fondly of you.

What is funny?

A discussion this weekend got me thinking, what is funny?











My friend and I watched The Five Year Engagement and were perplexed because there were two scenes in particular that had us busting out laughing.  In fact, we were both brought to tears.  One involved a wedding toast by the sister of the bride who couldn't stop crying.  The other involved an argument between said sisters disguised in the voices of Elmo and Cookie Monster as it occurred in front of one sister's children.  Evidently we were the only ones that found those particular moments funny because you could've heard a pin drop were it not for our laughter.

Now, I'm going to be honest here.  I've always fancied myself a fan of intelligent humor (see Arrested Development, 30 Rock, Parks & Rec, etc).  I don't get Two and a Half Men.  I don't get The Big Bang Theory.  I don't get Adam Sandler movies.  I don't get the Three Stooges.  Farting isn't funny.  Burping isn't funny.  Poop jokes aren't funny.  Basically, low brow is just not my kind of humor.  But is it fair to look down on it?  Because I do.

But really, what is funny?  It would be boring if we all found the same things funny.  I may like humor that makes you think a little.  You may like poop jokes.  Does that make me any better than you?  Well, obviously yes.  But I'll try my best to stop being a snob about it.

I Love LA

It's no secret.  I have a massive love affair with Los Angeles.  Sure she angers me and sometimes I hate her, but most of the time I'm head over heels in love.  I love the culture.  I love the people.  I love the neighborhoods.  I love the food.  I love the weather.

I stumbled across this love letter on a blog the other day and felt the urge to post it because it so accurately captures the awesomeness that is Los Angeles.

Copied from http://foodlatio.com/post/9960190970/los-angeles-i-love-you

You met her at a bar.
She was a perfect 10.
Actress. Model. Dancer. Whatever.

You’ve seen her in pictures, watched her on TV, and heard about her from friends but you always wondered. And now she is right in front of you, but there’s just one problem, she’s a raging bitch.

She rarely pays attention to you.
She makes you feel insignificant.
She hates your friends.
She hates your apartment.
She hates your car.
She is always looking over your shoulder at someone else.
She four squares everything.
She loves TMZ.

She makes it really hard to love her.

Her name is Los Angeles.

I am part of the rare breed of Native Los Angelenos, yes we do exist.  I grew up in the neighborhood of Atwater Village (you know that strip of land in between Intelligentsia and Armenia). After 27 years of living and growing up in this town I can say I hated it. I was sick of the traffic, $14 martinis, the Ed Hardy, the yogis, the vegans, the valley, everything. So I moved away. I moved to Connecticut for a glimpse of the countryside, the “better life”. I worked there for 2 years, paid super low rent, and spent weekends in New York. But about half way through that endeavor I realized I missed LA.

I missed the culture.
I missed the style.
I missed the 24 hour restaurants.
I missed the music.
I missed living in a place where “limited release” movies were actually released.
I missed the weather.

There was a period during winter in Connecticut when I didn’t see the sun for two weeks. I decided to get in my truck and drive south until I hit sunshine (it took 3 hours). While I met some amazing people in my time in the Northeast I knew it wasn’t for me.

And so I came back to California. I took an almost 40% pay cut to come back to the Angel City because I missed her.

I came back to her culture.
I came back to her fashion.
I came back to her culinary mecca.
I came back to her art.
I came back to her opportunities.

The movie industry films here because its 70 degrees and sunny every day so you can work year round. While other parts of the country have snow, heat waves, and humidity I rarely go a day without sandals on my feet. You can take your tornados and I’ll keep my earthquakes (we don’t even look up from our iphones for less than a 5.0). Each neighborhood has it’s own personality may it be from the hipsters in Silverlake, the key grips in the valley, the plastics in Beverly Hills, La Raza in Boyle heights, or the stoners in Venice. Sure there is ubiquitous traffic that everyone complains about but that’s only from people that don’t actually live here. People that live here accept that its part of the package deal and don’t complain about it. It would be like New Yorkers complaining about that weird smell in the subway or all the graffiti. Celebrities that constantly complain in interviews about how everyone here is “so fake” might want to re read their job description and then hang out with a different crowd. There are real people here and I have seen them in these streets that I know so well working as a Paramedic. I have rubbed elbows with them at In N’ Out, we have waited for our Grande soy sugar free vanilla lattes together, and I have cheered with them at the upper deck of Laker games. So don’t belittle my city celebrities, a city that has brought you so much.

Most tourists hate this town too but LA is like a fungus, it grows on you. There is no immediate visual pull like San Francisco, or history like Paris, or skyline like New York. There is no real town center like most any other city of the world. Think about it, what do you tell out of towners to do once they get here? I have no idea either. Besides Hollywood blvd. there is no Eiffel Tower, Statue of Liberty, or Wrigley FIeld. When they ask you where to stay you say, “it depends”. When they ask you what to eat, “it depends”. Each neighborhood has a personality as does each cuisine and each person here. While we may not have many marquee attractions, what we do have is a bunch tiny pieces to the mosaic that makes up this great city.

Don’t get me wrong though, as with any relationship you sometimes hate each other. The parking, pretentious hostesses/bouncers, cupcakes, greenpeace volunteers, menus that tell you what’s NOT in your food (no preservatives, gluten-free, no dairy, flourless, etc.). Sure she may nag you, tell you to take out the trash, or ask you if you think these pants make her look fat but this is the place you, me, and that guy next to you in the Prius have chosen to live.

This is where I grew up and this is my town, and if you don’t like it get the fuck out, because traffic here is a bitch.

Los Angeles, I love you.

Eternally Yours,
Chris Backley
(foodlatio.com)

You know what movie I forgot about?!

I completely forgot this movie came out in 2011. It was even my birthday gift to myself. Failure on my part. I'm not certain exactly where this fits in on my list though. Honestly, I think it's tied for #1. It was so much fun to watch. I could watch Kristen Wiig and Maya Rudolph read a phone book. I just find them utterly hilarious. And the other girls were great, too. I loved this movie because it managed to be laugh out loud funny and still tell a thoughtful story that had heart. Let's give it up for the ladies!

The Long Delayed Annual Movie Post

To sum up my feelings about the 2011 movie season, I'll go with pretty good but not really great. I felt overall it was pretty ho hum. To utilize a sports metaphor...there weren't too many that hit it out of the ballpark, but there was a lot of good, solid small ball. I usually go with a top 10 list, but there just weren't enough deserving of that. In honor of the Oscars weird nominating rules, I'm going to populate this with a weird number between 5 and 10. Remember, this list consists of movies that I feel are the best of the year. And by best, I mean my favorite. Because honestly, I've only got three best picture nominees on my list.

I'm thinking we do a countdown, so let's go.


7) The Descendants. I almost left this movie off of my list, but ended up throwing it in. I didn't love the movie; I liked the movie. But I loved the performances. The performances are why this movie made my top 7 list. George was great. The girl who played his daughter was great. Judy Greer stole the show in all of the 5 minutes she was on screen. And they brought back Matthew Lillard? C'mon?! The story was compelling, but I can't figure out if I like Alexander Payne. I loved Election, but didn't like Sideways or About Schmidt. And there was something that I just didn't connect with in this movie, but I can't put my finger on it. I'm gonna put the blame on Payne and his style of storytelling.


6) Moneyball. I love movies. I love baseball. A movie about baseball?! You don't have to do much selling there. I was late to the game watching this one for some reason. I really didn't expect it to have as much baseball as it did because everyone kept saying it's not really that much about baseball. Are you kidding me? It was all about baseball. They just made it interesting and told a great story, so people cared and could look past the baseball if it wasn't their cup of tea. Brad was good, but he usually is. He's not my favorite and I don't find him dreamy, but he's a solid actor and you can usually bank on a pretty good performance from him. Good, not great. I've yet to see greatness in him.


5) The Help. I was excited when I found out they were making this move, but a little scared that it would turn out too saccharin. Thankfully it didn't. Viola Davis and Octavia Spencer were phenomenal, and they both deserve Oscar gold. This movie also introduced me to Jessica Chastain who was in about every movie that came out this year. And that's ok by me. She was great as the outsider who couldn't fit in. I have a feeling she'll get her some Oscar gold, too, before her career's over, but not for this role. The spotlight belongs to Ms. Davis and Ms. Spencer.


4) Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol. Why this movie wasn't on more year end best lists is baffling. It was the best action movie I've seen in a long time. I'm a sucker for a good action movie, and I love the Mission: Impossible franchise. Save for #2, let's just forget about that one. I'll admit that I was a bit partial to this one because a good chunk of it took place in Dubai at the Burj Khalifa and came out the same time I got back from Dubai where I stayed overnight at said Burj Khalifa. But that connection aside, I still would have loved the movie. Tom Cruise may be a nut, but he's still a stud. Breaking out of prison, infiltrating the Kremlin, scaling the side of the tallest building in the world, a car chase through a dust storm, fighting til near death in a weird circular parking structure. There's nothing he can't do. If I'm ever in peril, I hope they send Ethan Hunt to save me.


3) The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. I'm surprised this film didn't get nominated. Honestly, I wasn't looking forward to it. I'm not gaga about the books like some people, and I've seen the first two of the Swedish films which are alright. The trailer is what got me intrigued about the movie. It had the single greatest movie trailer I've ever seen. "The feel bad movie of the year." Brilliant. I love David Fincher's films, so the trailer got me hooked. I thought this version far exceeded the Swedish version and really captured the tone of the book and the title character. She's this fragile, yet incredibly tough and resourceful girl who's had an incredibly difficult life. The subject matter is intense, and I hated a couple of the scenes but I knew they were going to be there because they were lifted straight from the book. It was just beautifully shot, and I can't wait for the next one. Hopefully Fincher sticks around for part 2.


2) Take Shelter. My two favorite movies are probably two you've never even heard of, but don't let that stop you from seeing them. Although, I'll warn you. These aren't for the masses. If you like your stories neatly tied up by the time the credits roll, you'll want to avoid them. Take Shelter was my second favorite movie of the year. It was written and directed by fellow Arkansan, Jeff Nichols. It's also the second Jessica Chastain movie on my list (there was almost a third, but I left The Debt off at the last minute). The story is about a husband and father who starts having apocalyptic visions. The movie sucks you into his paranoia about whether these visions are real or whether he's succumbing to the mental illness that plagues his mother. Great story, great performances, great filmmaking. I can't wait until his next movie comes out, which he just so happened to film entirely on location in Arkansas and stars a couple of people you may have heard of...just Reese Witherspoon and Matthew McConaughey.


1) Martha Marcy May Marlene. This was hands down my favorite movie of the year. You may have heard of it only because it was the first major role for Elizabeth Olson, younger sister of Mary Kate and Ashley, and that fact got it a lot of press. Smart move on the director's part casting her and bonus, she's amazing! The movie centers on a young girl who escapes from a cult and is trying to assimilate into her estranged sister's life. The film jumps back and forth between her time with the cult and her time with her sister. The movie develops the viewer's sense of paranoia along with the title character's as she becomes increasingly convinced that she can never escape the cult. Fair warning, this movie contains a couple of intense scenes that I wish they wouldn't have included, but I can understand why they did. Elizabeth Olson and Sarah Paulson gave two of the best performances of the year, and I'm kind of disappointed they didn't get more major awards season love. Although I think Elizabeth Olson did get an Independent Spirit Award nomination, which is much deserved. I realize that if you don't like to feel the character's paranoia, then you probably won't like either of my top two. But if you like a good psychological drama, then you should check them both out.

And there you have it. My 7 favorite movies of the years. What were yours?