A Valentine's Funeral

Today was a first for me. A funeral on Valentine's Day. Usually I'm annoyed by this holiday and like to wallow in my loneliness. But instead, I sit here both somber and filled with joy. My friend Jessica's twin sister passed away last week. I had only met Jennifer once, but have gotten to know Jessica and their mother, Helen, over the last year as I've become more involved in my church. I can remember Jessica sitting on the floor of my bedroom back a few months ago and sharing her frustrations and concerns over both her and her sister's sickness. Jennifer was fighting through her third bout with cancer and Jessica, her first. I remember telling her what a wonderful witness her entire family was to me. They kept getting knocked down, but their faith never waivered. I can only hope that my faith is as strong as theirs when tough times approach. In the interim, Helen was also diagnosed with cancer, but both she and Jessica have successfully attacked it and have clean bills of health.

Jennifer's funeral was the most moving one I have ever attended. She was a woman of strong faith, even through her sickness. During the service, they shared some of her writings which painted the picture of a young woman who was secure in her salvation, but struggling through life's battles as we all are. Most funerals focus on the fact that our loved one is in a better place or as Jessica said in her eulogy how everyone is a saint on the day of their funeral, but rarely do they focus much on the brokenness and struggles of the individual. But through her writings, Jennifer was able to share her struggles and hope with everyone one last time. Yes she was battling cancer, yes she was sad to see her loved ones sad and yes she longed for more time to spend here on earth, but she was comforted by the fact that she knew she was headed to her eternal home.

I feel we too often gloss over death and reflect on life with too bright of a view. Life is hard. We're going to struggle. Just because we know Jesus doesn't mean we aren't going to experience loss and hurt and anger. We still live in a fallen world. But we can take comfort in the fact that Jesus has already rescued us from this world. He's just chosen to take some of us home earlier than others.

Jennifer, thank you for your wonderful witness and for reminding us all that it's ok to struggle and question. I rejoice that you're no longer suffering and are in the presence of Jesus! And I continue to hold Jessica, your parents, and your husband close to my heart as they are left to carry on without you until the day that you are all together again.


Suppose you are a gardener employed by another. It is not your garden, but you are called upon to tend it. You have taken great care with a certain number of roses; you have trained them up, and there they are, blooming in their beauty. You come one morning into the garden, and you find that the best rose has been taken away. You are angry. You go to your fellow servants and charge them with having taken the rose. They declare that they had nothing to do with it, and one says, "I saw the master walking here this morning; I think he took it." Is the gardner angry then? No, at once he says, "I am happy that my rose should have been so fair as to attract the attention of the master. It is his own. He has taken it, let him do what seems good."

-Charles Haddon Spurgeon